Author: 颜凉雨 / Yan Liang Yu
Translator: Kinky || https://kinkytranslations.com/
Chapter 158: Extra Chapter – Chi Yingxue
“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming back to Beijing?” As Chi Zhuolin entered the door, he frowned at the cramped double room in front of him but didn’t ask if he should get a luxury room instead—an obviously face-slapping question. Chi Yingxue had the card that could be swiped for anything. Staying in a standard room could only mean one reason—he wanted to.
“You didn’t tell me, yet you located me precisely.” Chi Yingxue pulled the room’s only chair over.
Chi Zhuolin was about to step forward when he saw his younger brother naturally sit down on it.
He immediately felt at ease, confirming this was indeed his younger brother.
Hanging his coat on the wall, Chi Zhuolin looked around the room. Apart from that chair, there were only two beds with the quilts rolled up into balls.
“Which bed is yours?” Chi Zhuolin asked. He was never the type to stand because there was no chair for him but sitting on someone else’s bed was still somewhat impolite.
“Both are mine,” Chi Yingxue said matter-of-factly, with a childishly domineering tone.
Chi Zhuolin felt a headache coming on.
The key reason he never settled down or had children was Chi Yingxue—taking care of a younger brother was already draining enough, let alone having a child. He definitely didn’t want one.
“How long will you stay in Beijing this time?” Chi Zhuolin picked a relatively less messy bed, flipped the quilt, and sat at the corner of the bed with his back naturally straight, legs crossed, and fingers interlocked on his knee, managing to make the corner of the bed feel like an executive chair.
“A day or two.” Chi Yingxue tilted his chin towards the next room. “Depends on them.”
“So rushed?” Chi Zhuolin originally wanted to arrange some hospitality activities for Xu Wang and others as a regular thank you and reward. After all, this group of travel friends had been with Chi Yingxue for the longest time. Moreover, Chi Zhuolin had investigated; all four had clean backgrounds. He wasn’t too worried about Chi Yingxue hanging out with such people. “Where to next?”
Chi Yingxue opened a pack of fruit gummies on the table, tossing an orange-flavored one into his mouth. “Guizhou.”
“Guizhou?” Chi Zhuolin frowned. “You really think you’re Xu Xiake*?”
*A Chinese travel writer and geographer of the Ming dynasty, known best for his famous geographical treatise, and noted for his bravery and humility. He traveled throughout China for more than 30 years, documenting his travels extensively.
Shaanxi, Anhui, Henan, Chongqing, Jiangsu, Guangdong, Hunan… A map of China appeared in Chi Zhuolin’s mind, half of it already stamped with his younger brother’s footsteps.
Chi Yingxue yawned in boredom, then tossed a second strawberry-flavored candy into his mouth. “Didn’t you say it’s better than loafing around? Traveling is good for the health, and it’s eco-friendly.”
“That doesn’t mean you should never stop traveling.” Chi Zhuolin felt helpless. He just hoped his brother would go out and breathe some fresh air. Now, it seemed like Journey to the West.
Chi Yingxue raised an eyebrow, glancing at him nonchalantly. “Would you rather I stayed in Beijing and annoyed you?”
Chi Zhuolin’s face stiffened, seriously saying, “I’ve never found you annoying.”
Chi Yingxue said, “I find you annoying.”
Chi Zhuolin: “……”
Chi Yingxue laughed, knowing that verbal sparring wouldn’t yield anything substantial, but seeing Chi Zhuolin at a loss for words made him happy. After all, this person always acted all high and mighty, educating him, making every face-to-face feel like he was being looked down on—a real disadvantage.
“You, stop trying to manage me.” Chi Yingxue sat up straight, imitating Chi Zhuolin’s tone and posture, and patted his brother’s shoulder kindly. “Manage the company, manage the property, and if you have any energy left, get married and have an heir…”
“Are you advising me or cursing me?” Chi Zhuolin had just opened a bottle of water, but upon hearing that, he didn’t feel like drinking anymore, fearing he might choke.
Chi Yingxue spread his hands, feigning a look of being wronged despite good intentions.
A subtle feeling swept through Chi Zhuolin’s heart. Although Chi Yingxue was always infuriating, “relationship issues” were never a topic he joked about.
Narrowing his eyes slightly, he scanned the room again, seeing no signs of another person. However, curiosity drove him to launch a sudden attack. “Are you in a relationship?”
Just as Chi Yingxue put the third grape-flavored candy in his mouth, he heard this and swallowed reflexively, sending the candy down his throat.
The candy hadn’t fully softened, stuck in his throat painfully. Chi Yingxue frowned, resisting the urge to grab the water bottle Chi Zhuolin had just opened but hadn’t drunk from, and swallowed a few times to finally get the candy down.
He breathed a sigh of relief and changed the subject. “Yan Wang is gone.”
Chi Zhuolin, calculating his next move, was thrown off by this abrupt statement.
“What did you say?” He asked again, cautiously, afraid he had misheard.
Chi Yingxue looked up at him, calmly stating, “Yan Wang, is gone.”
“Is he… gone forever, or just temporarily…” Chi Zhuolin’s voice trembled with excitement.
“Here.” Chi Yingxue pointed to his chest. “I can’t find him anymore.”
Chi Zhuolin could clearly hear his own heartbeat, thumping like a drum.
In the past, even if Yan Wang was asleep, Chi Yingxue could accurately locate him and even wake him up. More often than not, Yan Wang wasn’t asleep but was struggling with Chi Yingxue in his heart.
So Chi Zhuolin understood the significance of “can’t find”.
But he didn’t understand. “How could it suddenly…”
Chi Yingxue smiled at him, almost ethereally, under the dim light. “Pretend I had a very long dream, and now, the dream is over.”
Chi Zhuolin couldn’t help but feel heartache while touching his brother’s head. “It’s good you’re awake.” These words gave him an inexplicable sense of relief, so he repeated, “It’s good you’re awake.”
Without any concrete evidence, based solely on Chi Yingxue’s lips barely touching, Chi Zhuolin chose to believe, or rather, he hoped more than anyone that it was true.
That brother, who always switched between personalities, was both heart-wrenching and alienating. Despite reading countless psychology books, despite constantly telling himself that the other personality was also his brother, it was hard to truly accept.
He found it difficult to regard Yan Wang as his brother, and Yan Wang never treated him as a brother either.
The matter of treatment stalled due to Chi Yingxue’s resistance. Although he scoffed at some psychologists’ approaches, “treatment” itself was the only method Chi Zhuolin could rely on.
“So,” Chi Yingxue propped his head with one hand, smiling at Chi Zhuolin, “you don’t have to feel indebted to me anymore.”
Chi Zhuolin’s brows slowly furrowed, as if puzzled.
Chi Yingxue looked at him indifferently. “Back then, when you were at the boarding school, you didn’t understand why I was afraid of him, but you still sent me letters within your capabilities. Strictly speaking, you don’t owe me; instead, I owe you.”
Chi Zhuolin finally understood, but his frown deepened, and his tone grew heavier. “Do you think my treatment of you now is to make up for the past?”
Chi Yingxue lightly raised an eyebrow, as if to say, “Isn’t it?”
Chi Zhuolin gave him a sidelong glance without mercy. “You’re overthinking it. Back then, I was powerless. I couldn’t even speak up at home. Even if I knew how he treated you, what could I do besides suffer with you?”
“Listen clearly.” Chi Zhuolin looked at him firmly, with an authoritative tone in his voice. “I treat you well for one reason—you’re my brother.”
Chi Yingxue was silent for a few seconds, then suddenly smiled. “Then give me half of the family wealth, and we can go our separate ways. You won’t have to deal with me as a burden anymore.”
“I refuse.” Chi Zhuolin didn’t hesitate for a second, refusing outright and confidently. “No matter how much I give you, with the way you only spend without earning, you’ll end up homeless.”
Chi Yingxue smirked. “You still can’t bear to let me go.”
Chi Zhuolin snorted. “I gave you that card with no limit. You’re welcome to try and spend all my money.”
A mischievous glint flashed in Chi Yingxue’s eyes. “Don’t regret it when the time comes.”
Chi Zhuolin looked at him and elegantly smiled. “If your spending can catch up with my ability to earn money, then you win.”
“……” Chi Yingxue finally understood how his teammates felt when he was overly confident.
Chi Zhuolin’s gaze inadvertently fell on the gummies on the desk. He was about to lecture Chi Yingxue on eating less sweets when he saw him suddenly lower his eyes, exhaling softly.
“Sometimes, I feel like he’s gone forever.” Chi Yingxue’s voice was low and distant. “And sometimes, I feel like he’s never left…”
Chi Zhuolin’s heart tightened, clearly understanding “he” referred to Yan Wang.
“You just said you couldn’t find him…” Chi Zhuolin’s words were cut off by Chi Yingxue suddenly looking up.
The gaze that met his was direct and sharp, like a knife.
Chi Zhuolin’s heart sank. He was too familiar with that expression. “Yan Wang…”
The person opposite him smirked, first with a mocking curve, then the smile could no longer be restrained and turned into genuine pride. “Just kidding.”
“……” Watching Chi Yingxue turn back into himself in an instant, Chi Zhuolin didn’t know whether to be angry or relieved.
But one thing he was sure of—this was definitely retaliation for his grand statements about earning money!
“Knock, knock—”
The unexpected knocking on the door interrupted the “tender moment” between the brothers.
Chi Zhuolin, puzzled, watched as Chi Yingxue got up, naturally walked over, and opened the door without asking.
“The captain sent me to call you out for supper. We found a particularly delicious place nearby…” Kuang Jinxin’s voice paused upon seeing Chi Zhuolin inside, surprised. “Mr. Chi?”
Chi Yingxue turned to look at Chi Zhuolin. He didn’t say anything and just silently looked at him.
Chi Zhuolin correctly interpreted the silent message to leave. He gracefully stood up, took his coat over his arm, and walked to the door. “You guys eat. I’m heading back.”
Kuang Jinxin glanced between Chi Yingxue and Chi Zhuolin, unsure of the situation but politely offered, “Why not join us?”
Chi Yingxue pulled Kuang Jinxin into the room with one arm and pushed Chi Zhuolin out with the other. “He has work to do at the company.”
“Oh.” Kuang Jinxin nodded blankly, then his gaze turned to a respectful send-off for Chi Zhuolin.
Chi Zhuolin felt a pang of self-pity, but seeing Chi Yingxue and Kuang Jinxin getting along well, he couldn’t help but feel happy and relieved that his brother was making friends.
After watching Chi Zhuolin disappear in the elevator, Kuang Jinxin turned back to continue discussing the supper plans with Chi Yingxue, only for the latter to stretch out his hand and close the door.
Kuang Jinxin was just there to pass a message and was planning to leave, but Chi Yingxue’s action of closing the door subtly changed the atmosphere.
Equally strange was Chi Yingxue, who, after closing the door, remained silent, all emotions hidden under the shadow of his eyelashes.
“What’s wrong?” Kuang Jinxin asked softly, sensing it had something to do with Chi Zhuolin.
What had the brothers just talked about? Yan Wang? Something in their childhood? A series of question marks popped up in Kuang Jinxin’s mind, along with those dark nightmares from the 9/23 level.
Suddenly, he was embraced.
A simple, solid hug.
“Don’t move. Let me hold you for a while.” Chi Yingxue’s voice came from above, sounding distant.
Kuang Jinxin stayed still, letting Chi Yingxue hug him without reciprocating.
He could clearly feel that Chi Yingxue didn’t need his response. The person holding him just needed something to hold—something warm, be it him, Kuang Jinxin, a doll, or a pillow.
Kuang Jinxin heard two heartbeats, one steady and strong, belonging to Chi Yingxue, and one rapid and chaotic, his own.
Chi Yingxue originally didn’t plan to say anything. He had already said too much to Chi Zhuolin, feeling empty now and just wanted to hold onto something to ease the emptiness.
But the room was too quiet—so quiet that Chi Zhuolin’s words came back to haunt him.
[Are you in a relationship?]
A question Chi Yingxue had never considered was jokingly brought up by Chi Zhuolin.
It was as if a gummy had been thrown into the bottom of his heart, slowly melting. The sweetness was tingling, making it irresistible.
“Xiao Sijin.” Chi Yingxue suddenly spoke. He was still embracing him, his chin gently resting on top of his head, as if intending to continue this hug to the end of time. “Have you ever had a girlfriend?”
“No.” Kuang Jinxin turned his face to look at the wall beside him, where faint gray spots were easily overlooked, mistakable for pristine whiteness.
“What about a boyfriend?”
“No.”
“Do you want to?”
“Yes.”
“Then…”
“But I don’t want to be with you.”
Chi Yingxue pulled away and raised his eyebrows in displeasure. “Am I that bad?”
The tranquil and warm embrace was thus concluded by its initiator with a hasty full stop that seemed out of place with the process. Or perhaps, he never cared about these things.
“You’re not bad; you just never seem to know what you want.” Kuang Jinxin tried to smile at him but didn’t succeed. Embarrassment flickered in his eyes, yet he continued speaking, thankfully with a steady voice. “You just want someone to accompany you. It doesn’t matter who, as long as they’re with you.”
Chi Yingxue was puzzled. “So, I chose you.”
Kuang Jinxin sighed, not knowing how to make him understand. “Dating requires mutual affection, like the captain and Sheng Ge.” He tried to soften his voice, hoping Chi Yingxue wouldn’t get angry and would listen. “Wanting someone’s company out of loneliness isn’t the same as liking them.”
Chi Yingxue fell silent, but the temperature in his beautiful eyes was dropping.
He was angry.
Kuang Jinxin was frustrated.
Actually, Chi Yingxue’s personality was quite simple: agree with him, and he’s happy; oppose him, and he gets irritable, especially when he’s unwilling to compromise or temper his mood.
But this matter was different from others; he couldn’t just agree with him.
Otherwise, Chi Yingxue might feel better, but then Kuang Jinxin would truly be trapped.
Chi Yingxue only wanted companionship and could only offer companionship, but Kuang Jinxin wanted more. Knowing it was unattainable yet still falling for it was too painful.
Kuang Jinxin was selfish; he didn’t want to suffer.
“I, the captain, the advisor, and Qian Ge—we will all be with you,” before the temperature in Chi Yingxue’s eyes hit rock bottom, Kuang Jinxin said. “Even if we leave the Owl, we will always be friends.”
Chi Yingxue blinked gently, his emotions unclear under the dim light.
“Xiao Sijin, do you know what I hate most about you?” He finally spoke, his voice softer and almost tender than Kuang Jinxin’s.
Kuang Jinxin froze.
Chi Yingxue slowly uttered the word, “Hypocrisy.”
A pang of inexplicable pain hit Kuang Jinxin.
Chi Yingxue continued on his own. “Even when facing people you dislike, you can say a bunch of nice things. It’s as if everyone is struggling in the mire, and only you stand on the shore, pitying them.”
“Actually, you might have cursed them countless times in your heart, but the nice words coming out of your mouth seem particularly sincere and credible.” He stepped back, scrutinizing Kuang Jinxin’s face, and finally nodded. “Yeah, it’s because of this face of yours—too upright, too misleading.”
Kuang Jinxin blinked, his gaze a little lost and slightly shrinking.
Reason told him that Chi Yingxue was just angry because he was rejected—that his words shouldn’t be taken to heart.
But emotionally, he thought that maybe this was Chi Yingxue’s true feelings—that this was how he saw him.
“Knock, knock, knock, knock—”
A careless knock on the door made Kuang Jinxin shudder.
But he quickly reacted, swiftly turning to open the door.
Outside was Qian Ai, who immediately complained upon seeing Kuang Jinxin open the door. “How come you couldn’t even call someone out!”
After saying that, he slowly noticed Chi Yingxue standing in the entrance as well, pausing for a moment, his gaze shifting back and forth between the two. “What’s going on with you two? If there’s something to talk about, do it over dinner. Why stand here?”
“Oh, Mr. Chi came over. He just left.” Kuang Jinxin, unable to fabricate a lie, resorted to the truth as a deflection.
“Chi Zhuolin?” Qian Ai’s attention was indeed diverted. “Why didn’t you ask him to join us?”
Before Kuang Jinxin could answer, Qian Ai had already figured it out himself. “I get it. The boss must be busy.”
“Alright, hurry up and change. We’ll wait for you in the lobby downstairs.” After speaking to Chi Yingxue and Kuang Jinxin, Qian Ai considerately pulled Kuang Jinxin, who had already changed, out with him, naturally expecting him to come downstairs with himself, who was also ready.
Chi Yingxue looked at Qian Ai’s hand on Kuang Jinxin’s shoulder, frowning unconsciously.
Unaware, Qian Ai closed the door with a “bang”, considerately locking it from the outside for his teammate.
This meal, Chi Yingxue ate without taste, occasionally glancing at Kuang Jinxin, who was just eating silently. Until the meal ended and they returned to the hotel, Chi Yingxue still hadn’t caught a single glance from him.
Kinky Thoughts:
This marks the end of the third volume. Just one more to go.
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