Author: 易修罗 / Yi Xiu Luo

Translator: Kinky || https://kinkytranslations.com/

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Chapter 34

The prison guard watched as the person who had just been brought in was taken out again. Kindheartedly, he shouted to their retreating figures, “Happy newlyweds!”

However, the expected “thank you” didn’t come, and neither of the two looked back. He couldn’t understand. Wasn’t forming a bond supposed to be a happy occasion?

On the aircraft returning to the academy, the principal looked worriedly at Ying Feng and Ling Xiao, sitting on opposite sides by the window, their gazes fixed on the distant horizon. Like mirror images of each other, their expressions, postures, and gestures were identical.

Since leaving the detention center, they hadn’t spoken, touched, or made eye contact. Although the other was right beside them, it felt as if there was only an invisible person sitting there. Forget the close bond between a Qizhu and a Qizi; even the camaraderie between classmates seemed nonexistent.

Outside the window, the evening lights were just beginning to shine, and the stars were few. The aircraft silently traversed the night sky. Everything was quiet; even the engine’s mechanical sounds were minimized.

For Ling Xiao, this had been the longest day of his life. So much had happened that every second could write a lengthy story. On the surface, he appeared calm—too calm for someone who had just undergone a coming-of-age ceremony—and this made the principal even more worried.

The more composed one appears, the more likely they are restraining their true feelings, which might collapse when pushed to a limit. This strong and stubborn young man, who had tearfully recited his vows during the farewell ceremony, who could have imagined that in less than half a month, those solemn promises would be ruthlessly shattered?

The aircraft quietly landed at the academy’s airfield. Though they had only been away for three days, it felt like three years. What changed wasn’t just the color of their eyes, but the weight of their emotions.

As the three of them disembarked, the principal stopped the two about to leave. “I know you’ve already been thoroughly checked at the military medical station, but it’s still necessary to report to the school doctor. It’s a tradition.”

The two complied, with Ying Feng leading and Ling Xiao following. The principal watched their retreating figures, lost in thought. A tragedy had already occurred at the academy this year; could another one be looming?

Yao Tai was about to leave when she almost collided with Ying Feng at the door. Seeing his face, the experienced doctor took a sharp breath.

“Oh, my God,” she whispered. Although she had heard rumors, seeing it first hand was still shocking. Instinctively, she looked past him, and Ling Xiao’s presence once again confirmed the truth, making her emotions incredibly mixed for a moment.

Ying Feng ignored her shock and stepped forward. The person behind him wanted to follow, but he was stopped with a command.

“Stay here,” Ying Feng’s tone was almost an order.

Ling Xiao hesitated for a moment and eventually remained outside the door.

Ying Feng once again lay shirtless on the examination table. Yao Tai conducted a full examination, and compared to the military medical report, his body showed significant recovery. There was no trace of injury, which, even among the Tianxiu known for their healing, was rare.

Holding the report, Yao Tai seemed troubled.

“Is there a problem?” Ying Feng asked, sitting up.

Wanting clarity amidst the rumors, Yao Tai listened as Ying Feng recounted the events.

“…When the alarm sounded, I rushed back to join the main force but got lost because I wasn’t familiar with the area. Ling Xiao was with me the entire time.”

“We accidentally discovered that lab. The door had a sign reading ‘Research Restricted Area, No Unauthorized Entry’, but we were curious and went in.”

“We didn’t stay long before you and the doctor arrived. Afraid, we hid and overheard your conversation, learning about the contents of the bottle.”

“Ling Xiao’s taking it was out of curiosity. My failure to stop him was my fault. This matter has implicated both you and the doctor. The military might soon question you and even blame you for negligence. I apologize for this and am ready to face any punishment.”

As Yao Tai listened, her anger grew. The audacious actions of these two fledglings were beyond description. They actually dared to steal from the base, and what they stole was incredibly important. What infuriated her more was that, as the chief administrator of the base, Zhi Shang hadn’t even noticed afterward.

“You two really are…” she trailed off, not finding the right words to describe her feelings, leaving the sentence hanging.

Ying Feng’s tone remained cold, as if describing someone else’s business. “During our field practice, we had an accident and encountered a Kui in the mine. In a moment of desperation, Ling Xiao injected the Embers, saving both our lives.”

“But because of the cave-in, we were trapped inside. Ling Xiao, due to side effects, went berserk. What followed was just as you saw.”

Yao Tai’s emotions shifted from anger to ambivalence upon hearing this. On one hand, she was outraged at their audacious theft. On the other, she felt a lingering fear for their predicament. Had they not had the Embers, perhaps the only news would have been the eternal demise of two fledgling souls during their field practice.

With this in mind, she wasn’t sure if what they did was right or wrong.

“Later, the military arrived in time to rescue us. That’s basically how it all happened,” Ying Feng finished explaining.

Yao Tai was so stunned that she couldn’t speak for a while. After a moment, she opened her mouth.

“The reason why the Tianxiu people become stronger during the coming-of-age ceremony is because of a special substance secreted within their bodies. Not only does this substance enhance a person’s fighting abilities, but it also stimulates physiological desires and overpowers one’s rationality, which is why lovers during the coming-of-age ceremony fight each other to the death.”

“The developer of Embers, my teacher, extracted this substance from the body. With it, he created Embers, allowing one to temporarily gain strength equivalent to that during the coming-of-age ceremony while eliminating its negative impacts. It was considered the greatest achievement of that era.”

“But my teacher didn’t stop there. Soon after, he refined the substance to twenty times its potency and created Embers II. However, he never had the chance to perfect it.”

“This means that while Embers II can temporarily elevate one’s fighting capabilities to unreachable heights, it fully retains its drawbacks. The negative effects of this substance are magnified for its users.”

“In other words, after injection, desire overwhelms reason. Fledglings who haven’t awakened will directly enter awakening, even losing control, triggering what we call the automatic coming-of-age ceremony.”

“But if someone were to inject the second generation without an antidote, even adults wouldn’t be able to resist its side effects.” Yao Tai pondered. “According to what you said, even if the military arrived on time, they wouldn’t have this special antidote. Why is Ling Xiao alright then?”

Ying Feng shook his head, indicating he didn’t know. It seemed Yao Tai would have to find the reason from Ling Xiao himself.

She gestured to the papers in her hand. “Your medical report is fine, but there’s a lot I need to explain to you. Before that, I need to examine Ling Xiao.”

She opened the door to the infirmary. Ling Xiao was sitting alone on a bench outside.

“Ling Xiao,” she began, thinking of his ordeal, her tone softened. “Come in, it’s your turn.”

As Ling Xiao entered, Ying Feng was halfway through dressing. Ling Xiao’s gaze briefly fell on Ying Feng’s chest, and he quickly turned away.

Ying Feng buttoned up his shirt calmly, walking past Ling Xiao, but Yao Tai reminded him again to stay. “Don’t go. I have more to say.”

Ling Xiao and Ying Feng switched places. The instruments that were just on Ying Feng were connected to Ling Xiao, but they had lost their previous warmth.

“How do you feel?” Yao Tai asked, her tone uncharacteristically gentle toward Ling Xiao.

“I don’t feel much,” Ling Xiao replied honestly. If he had to describe it in words, it’d be numbness. He wasn’t devastated, nor was he furious. This overly calm demeanor, after failing the coming-of-age ceremony, was an ominous sign. Having seen various fledglings after their ceremonies, Yao Tai found it hard to look at him. She turned away. “Get up.”

Ling Xiao quietly dressed. During this time, his examination results were printed. Yao Tai silently studied the displayed data, her face serious.

“Dr. Yao, tell me. I can handle it.”

Yao Tai weighed her words. “Your psychological state isn’t very optimistic.”

“Do I need to be handcuffed like Lan Sheng?”

Yao Tai’s eyes flickered. “Not necessary. It hasn’t reached that level.”

She placed both hands on his shoulders, trying to convey strength to him in this manner. “Ling Xiao, I know you’re feeling down and sad right now, but this is due to hormonal imbalances. You mustn’t think that these are your true feelings deep down.”

“Do you remember Lan Sheng? He didn’t truly want to jump either. At that moment, he was not in control of his senses; he was trapped within his own world, not listening to anyone. But that was not his true intention.”

Without saying a word, Ling Xiao gently removed Yao Tai’s hand. “I can distinguish.”

Those simple words could carry a lot of meaning. Because he could distinguish, he clearly understood that his feelings at this moment stemmed from psychology, not physiology. Such a thought was even more troubling.

“I know you’re proud, and you don’t easily bow down to others. But you’re with Ying Feng now, and only he can help you through this. I believe you understand his character better than I do. If you don’t reach out, your relationship will remain at an impasse.”

“I’m not asking you to show weakness. I just hope you can soften, even if it’s just a little bit. I believe Ying Feng will never reject you.”

This time, Ling Xiao didn’t even speak, simply shaking his head lightly to indicate that it was impossible. Yao Tai, feeling helpless, covered her face with her hand.

“Listen, Ying Feng is still here. He’s right outside the door. He hasn’t left. If he didn’t want to face you, he could’ve just walked away.”

“But he stayed, which means he’s willing to take responsibility. For that reason alone, you shouldn’t give up on yourself. Although he does have a side that never changes, always acting cold to everyone—it’s a personality flaw. Approaching him proactively not only helps him but helps you too.”

“The bond between you two was completely accidental. It’s hard for anyone to accept such an outcome at first, so it’s natural to act distant. But regardless of Ying Feng’s current attitude, as long as he’s willing to stay, there’s a chance for both of you to truly bridge the gap and come together.”

Ling Xiao shook his head. “There won’t be such a chance. Ying Feng has someone he likes from his past life. I ruined his opportunity. He must hate me to the bone now.”

“The person he likes?” Yao Tai was puzzled. “Not long ago, he mentioned that he hasn’t found a suitable partner.”

“He hasn’t, but the person he likes is his lover from his previous life. I know he has been searching.”

Yao Tai struggled to suppress her rising anger.

“A lover from his previous life?” she said with agitation. “Do you know how many have dreamt of being with their past life’s lover? Such a beautiful fantasy—almost everyone has had it. Being with the same person life after life—how romantic? Even I’ve had such unrealistic dreams.”

“But what about now? Even if I found out that Zhi Shang was my enemy in my past life, I’d still want to be with him in this life. This life is different from the past. There’s no connection.”

“I can’t imagine someone like Ying Feng harboring such thoughts, but trust me, no one dreams about this forever. Everyone eventually finds the love of their current life. Lovers from past lives are just naive wishes, and sooner or later they’re replaced by true love.”

Ling Xiao knew Ying Feng’s attachment to his past was not as fragile as Yao Tai described. Even buying unverified information at a high price, cherishing the peach pit kept in his pocket, and his determination to forsake the coming-of-age ceremony and fight the Kui to the death—between life and freedom, he had made his choice. But he couldn’t tell Yao Tai all of this.

Yet Yao Tai persisted. “You must have faith in the future. Even revealing such an embarrassing matter as having a lover from a past life to you shows you hold some place in his heart. There’s endless possibilities between you, especially since you like him…”

A hand reached out, covering her mouth and stopping her words.

“No, there’s no such thing.” Ling Xiao pulled his hand back. “I haven’t fallen for him.”

“You have. The report says so. When Ying Feng was mentioned, your psychological graph showed a clear fluctuation.”

“I admit I care about him a lot,” Ling Xiao interrupted her, “but it’s not because I like him. It could be admiration, disgust, jealousy, or something else, but it’s definitely not due to affection.”

Yao Tai sighed. “The waveforms shown by like and hate are different, and they are distinct from any other emotion. You can deceive yourself, but you can’t deceive the instrument.”

“Your instrument is broken,” he said calmly.

“My instrument has never been broken,” Yao Tai said helplessly. “Perhaps even you haven’t realized it. The way you care about him and how you exaggerate things to get his attention—all these behaviors have only one explanation. You like him, Ling Xiao. This is undeniable.”

There was a long silence in the medical room.

“Will Ying Feng see my physical examination report?” he asked, lowering his head.

“Yes, he is your Qizhu. He has the right to know.”

“Can you please not tell him about this?”

Yao Tai was caught in a dilemma. “It’s his right. No one can…”

“Please.”

It seemed like Yao Tai heard such a voice, and she paused, ensuring it wasn’t her imagination.

“What?”

“Please.” Ling Xiao raised his head with a faint hint of a teary shimmer in his eyes. Yao Tai was stunned. Anyone who saw such a proud young man utter these words with tears would undoubtedly be moved.

“I’ve already been humiliated enough. Please let me retain the last bit of my dignity.”

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