Author: 年终 / Nian Zhong

Translator: Kinky || https://kinkytranslations.com/

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Chapter 28: Underworld Team Building

“No,” Bai Shuangying said.

Then he left first, giving Fang Xiu no chance to say a word.

He was determined to uncover what it was about this human that could affect his seal. Bai Shuangying had heard that some people tattooed scripture or arrays on their bodies. Maybe Fang Xiu was hiding something under his clothes.

Besides, he wasn’t happy about being shut out.

Fang Xiu trudged back to the room, rubbing his face a few times.

It wasn’t really a big deal, and there was no way he was going to forcibly drive Bai Shuangying out, right?

The shower stall was barely a square meter, walled off on two sides by glass, with the other two sides against tile. On a little rack were white towels and bath sheets, looking surprisingly modern.

Fang Xiu removed his ring made of hair and wrapped it in a towel. Since the soul-nourishing spring supposedly washed away Yin energy, and the ring was an evil-spirit product, he worried it might dissolve like a puff of cotton candy.

“I’m actually taking off my clothes.”

He turned to face the wall while slowly pulling off his T-shirt.

Linking fingers with Bai Shuangying was no problem. Sleeping pressed against Bai Shuangying with their clothes on was no problem. Even being packed together inside a coffin barrel hadn’t made Fang Xiu feel shy.

Yet, being watched by Bai Shuangying while he showered… Fang Xiu was surprised to realize he still had a shred of modesty.

It was as if being naked changed things somehow!

But pressed to explain exactly how, Fang Xiu couldn’t find the difference.

Bai Shuangying’s gaze felt like a soft brush, sweeping up and down Fang Xiu’s spine. The back of Fang Xiu’s neck burned, and a prickling sensation spread across his shoulders. His hands hovered at his waistband, unable to make the final move.

He couldn’t take it anymore. Fang Xiu couldn’t help glancing over his shoulder.

Bai Shuangying sat rigidly on the ritual table opposite the bathroom, staring intently at his every move.

He wasn’t looking at Fang Xiu like a fellow man, or even like a fellow being. Bai Shuangying wore his usual unreadable expression, calm eyes tinged with inquisitiveness. It was strangely familiar, in a bizarre way.

Suddenly Fang Xiu was reminded of a cat that belonged to one of his elementary school classmates.

That cat also couldn’t stand being shut out. Whether its owners were using the toilet or taking a shower, it insisted on being there to supervise. Its stare had been exactly like Bai Shuangying’s in this moment.

Seeing Fang Xiu glance back, Bai Shuangying didn’t even blink, just tilted his head slightly.

Fang Xiu: “……”

Fang Xiu: “…Pfft.”

His ghost really was sort of adorable.

Feeling a bit better, Fang Xiu slowly tugged down his pants and turned on the faucet.

The soul-nourishing spring water was slightly cool, but it gave off a thick white mist as it flowed, carrying a faint smell of mugwort. The water was crystal-clear at first, but as it rinsed away the Yin energy from his body, it turned grimy and dark.

Fang Xiu cranked up the water, then stuck his head underneath, hoping to wash away his needless anxiety.

“Turn around,” Bai Shuangying said abruptly.

“Ah?” Fang Xiu nearly choked.

Bai Shuangying: “For the next ritual, I’ll help you as a ‘friend’. But first, I need to assess your physical condition.”

Fang Xiu: “You’re already helping me a lot. There’s no need to be so polite.”

“We’ve formed a contract, so a baseline level of assistance is required,” Bai Shuangying said. “But a ‘friend’ would help on his own initiative, yes?”

Fang Xiu wiped the water from his face, uncertain how to respond. Previously, he was the only one going on and on about “friendship”. Now that Bai Shuangying was actively playing along, Fang Xiu found himself at a loss.

When Fang Xiu still didn’t answer, Bai Shuangying continued, “Your clothes in the Tower are actually condensed from your vitality, and mine are the same. In reality, neither of us is actually wearing anything. Don’t overthink it.”

With that, Bai Shuangying casually lifted his left shoulder.

His white robe gradually melted and seeped into his skin. Part of the robe slid aside, revealing a graceful collarbone and a stretch of fair, taut flesh.

Fang Xiu: “…Stop! Stop! Stop! I get it. You don’t need to demonstrate any further! That’s enough!”

His neck felt scalding hot. His heart felt like it had been flash-boiled, and by the time he realized what was going on, he’d broken into a slight sweat.

Bai Shuangying looked over calmly, while Fang Xiu tried to say something, anything, to smooth things over. But his tongue went numb.

He’d thought a little embarrassment would quickly subside. After all, they were both men. Everything Fang Xiu had, Bai Shuangying presumably had…right?

Yet the subtle tension refused to vanish. Right now, he felt he’d rather smash ten more Shan Huanzi to pulp in front of Bai Shuangying than endure this.

Enough. There was no point in fussing about it. Fang Xiu discreetly drew a breath, covered his crucial areas with a towel, and turned around.

The moment Bai Shuangying saw Fang Xiu’s front, he let out a hum.

…So Fang Xiu did have something on his body, but it wasn’t any scripture or array.

Fang Xiu was quite slender, with eight interlacing knife scars crisscrossing his lower abdomen. His left thigh bore a large patch of old abrasions, while his right calf had a long scar that looked like it had been through some kind of treatment.

Ordinarily, these were all hidden under his clothes, impossible to see.

Bai Shuangying fell silent, his gaze once again brushing Fang Xiu like a coat of paint.

“All done?” The atmosphere was so weird that Fang Xiu coughed, trying to break the silence.

He had known it would turn out like this. Next, Bai Shuangying would probably ask about those wounds…

“You’re too thin,” Bai Shuangying remarked.

Fang Xiu: “?”

“Your body isn’t sturdy enough. It doesn’t look good, and it makes you easier to kill,” Bai Shuangying said in a tone that was more like a wildlife documentary voiceover.

His tone held neither curiosity nor pity, nor any forced indifference. It was as if those scars had simply been part of Fang Xiu from the start.

Fang Xiu suddenly laughed, pointing at the knife scars on his stomach.

“You’re not going to ask about these?”

“Why would I? They’re no different from growth rings,” Bai Shuangying answered calmly.

“You have these marks because you survived harsh ordeals. That’s a good thing.”

Sitting on the ritual table with his black hair and white robe softly draping down, Bai Shuangying at that moment looked even more like a god statue than the one in the Weishan Shrine.

Fang Xiu blinked, and a drop of water from his lashes ran into his eye, stinging it.

Everything went blurry, so he couldn’t quite make out that lovely face, but his heartbeat still skipped.

[Hey, did you hear? Oh dear, that child has it so rough…]

[Yes, it’s awful. How is he supposed to carry on…]

[So pitiful…]

[Poor thing…]

Countless old memories roiled in his mind. He had heard words like these so many times his ears had nearly grown calluses.

Fang Xiu didn’t hate the people who made those comments. He knew they meant no harm. But extra sympathy and pity could be like a sedative: not necessarily bad, but certainly something he didn’t need.

He had considered that Bai Shuangying might be curious or might not care at all, maybe even saying something dark and ghostly.

What Fang Xiu hadn’t expected was that, so far, he actually liked the evil spirit’s view the best.

…He hadn’t lost yet. He was still standing here, alive, and that was a good thing.

“Indeed, I am strong.”

Fang Xiu smiled brightly, relaxing entirely, almost forgetting that he was stark naked.

“As for my body shape, you’ll just have to deal with it. The Underworld doles out our ritual bodies. You can’t order custom ones. If I had my way, they’d give me something built like Fourth Master.”

Bai Shuangying thought for a moment. “That type is too bulky. And it’s not nice to look at.”

Fang Xiu: “…” So he’s picky about this, too.

Then he thought of a rather interesting question. “Since this body is just a magic weapon, can I feed it to my ‘Meal Card’? Suppose I smear a bit of blood on my enemy, hide out for two hours, then just press the Earth Knocking Cauldron onto them. Wow, that might be worse than an evil spirit.”

“No.”

Bai Shuangying crushed his fantasy. “It only destroys pure magic items. A magic item housing a soul can no longer be considered just a magic item.”

Fang Xiu was disappointed. “So what would that be considered?”

“A living soul inside an object is halfway to being an evil spirit,” Bai Shuangying said. “Also…”

Fang Xiu leaned in, intrigued. “Also?”

Bai Shuangying’s gaze flicked downward. “Your towel just fell.”

Fang Xiu: “……”

He silently picked up the towel, turning away. This time, not only was the back of his neck red, his entire face was, too.

……

After the shower, the first thing Fang Xiu did was test out his new ability. He pooled some of the soul-nourishing water on the floor and reached into its surface, pulling out a bottle of Wangzai brand milk.

Since it was originally an offering, he could drink it even without a physical body, which felt unexpectedly touching. After a moment’s thought, he took out a second bottle and placed it by Bai Shuangying.

Bai Shuangying: “I don’t like that kind of offering. It barely has any Yin energy.”

Fang Xiu: “I know. It’s actually for the God of Weishan. But you’re sitting on my ‘offering table’, so I can’t exactly place it anywhere else.”

Bai Shuangying: “……”

He looked down at Fang Xiu with a blank face.

Fresh out of his shower, Fang Xiu wore bright red clothes, with the black hair ring back on his finger. His unruly hair was still damp, the ends sticking to his skin, leaving his face fully exposed and making him look unexpectedly harmless.

“Thank you kindly, God of Weishan,” Fang Xiu said, stepping around him and putting his hands together solemnly.

“Thank you for letting us eat your offerings back then. This is just the promised return gift… Hey, hey. What are you doing?!”

Without another word, Bai Shuangying popped the can open and drank it. Then he leapt off the ritual table and once more stuck himself to the ceiling.

“You said it’s not packed with Yin energy,” Fang Xiu said helplessly.

“Humans sometimes eat stuff with no nutritional value,” Bai Shuangying replied.

Fang Xiu forced a chuckle. He could tell his ghost was displeased again. By all rights, he should say something gentle to coax him. But recalling Bai Shuangying’s remark about “friends”, Fang Xiu, on impulse, continued to pry.

He asked curiously, “What’s bothering you?”

“We’re friends, and friends come first,” Bai Shuangying replied righteously, finding this relationship quite convenient.

He had just spent a good while racking his brains about how to intervene in the next ritual “naturally” and “unobtrusively”.

“Folding Fang Xiu into the plans” was infinitely more complicated than just watching the drama from the sidelines. Ever since he’d come into existence, Bai Shuangying had planned only for himself, never involving other beings.

He’d been painstakingly figuring out ways to keep Fang Xiu alive a bit longer, but in the next moment he saw Fang Xiu grinning away, handing offerings to the God of Weishan.

What a complete reversal of priorities. If Bai Shuangying hadn’t lent a hand back then, there would be no God of Weishan in the first place.

Feeling annoyed, Bai Shuangying looked down to see Fang Xiu with crinkled eyes and a silly smile.

Fang Xiu tilted his head to look up. “Exactly. Friends should look out for each other. Want another drink? I’ve still got more.”

“No.”

“In that case, I’m gonna take a nap. Good afternoon!” Fang Xiu flopped back onto the bed and burrowed under the covers.

Within seconds, a few muffled chuckles sounded from inside the blanket.

Utterly baffling, Bai Shuangying thought.

……

Around noon, there was another knock at the door. This time it wasn’t the paper figure, but Jia Xu.

He sounded eager. “I’m organizing a little get-together. You in? We finally have a day off. We might as well get to know each other.”

This was indeed a good opportunity, so Fang Xiu didn’t refuse.

He didn’t say anything, but Bai Shuangying hopped down from the ceiling on his own, clearly indicating he was coming along.

The courtyard was laid out with lunch, much more lavish than breakfast.

The main starches came in three varieties: noodles, rice, and steamed buns. The dessert offerings had doubled, and there were plenty of fried or steamed dishes, plus delicacies like crabs and lobsters. Various drinks were lined up near the table, among which Fang Xiu spotted Maotai at a glance.

Sure enough, it was party time after a successful ritual.

Blondie clutched two bottles of Maotai, his face turning red as he drank. Mei Lan took a slice of cream cake, smiling faintly.

Jia Xu stood up with a cup of wine in hand. “Come on, meeting each other here is fate, even if it’s ‘bad’ fate, it’s still fate. Let’s do introductions so we know how to watch out for each other in the next ritual.”

With that, he started the introductions himself.

Jia Xu was twenty-nine this year, making him a year older than Fang Xiu. He was once a programmer and was currently a co-founder of a small IT start-up, truly deserving of the phrase “young and capable”.

“Whoa, boss, that’s awesome. I’ve heard of your company, and I’ve even played one of your games.” Blondie was grinning as though he’d never clashed with Jia Xu before.

Blondie’s real name was Du Zhichao, twenty-six, unemployed. He mentioned having some money on hand, living passably for now.

Mei Lan had just turned thirty-two and ran a store dealing in calligraphy and paintings; Cheng Songyun was a housewife; Guan He was still in high school. He was only sixteen, not even an adult yet.

At the mention of Guan He being sixteen, the group fell silent, then started cursing the Underworld for its cruelty. Blondie began drunkenly yelling he’d “take care of this little bro”, but Guan He ignored him completely.

All in all, there wasn’t a single major similarity among them. They lived in different cities and seemed to have been randomly selected by the Underworld.

“Fang Xiu, twenty-eight, hospital cleaning staff,” Fang Xiu said succinctly.

“Don’t joke around, buddy. What’s your real job?” Jia Xu didn’t believe him. By the look on Cheng Songyun’s face, she didn’t seem convinced either.

Fang Xiu repeated sincerely, “I’m just a cleaner. In a hospital, you see plenty of gore and drama, so I guess I got used to it.”

Obviously still doubtful, Jia Xu shrugged since Fang Xiu insisted on his story.

He pulled out a piece of cardboard. “I’ve put together some notes on the rules of the ‘E’. Everyone, take a look. We might need this tomorrow.”

No one knew where he had found it, but the text and diagrams on it resembled a sort of “Underworld PowerPoint”:

1. An E usually has three taboos, with one being lethal.
2. An E arises from a person’s obsession; the taboos connect to that obsession.
3. An E can only be broken in a “logical” way, or via specific spells as well.

Jia Xu: “Pay extra attention to number two. An E is kind of like a low-level AI that can’t distinguish good from bad.”

“Even though the God of Weishan had only benevolent intentions, the E still produced a ‘die if you don’t revere the god’ death taboo. So even if the taboos relate to the obsession, it’s not always straightforward.”

Blondie chimed in, “What’s the third line supposed to mean?”

“It means we have to figure out the nature of the E itself, then destroy it with a common-sense approach. For example, if the ‘obsession’ is about candy, then we need to eat it; simply crushing it with force won’t do any good… If it’s a candle, we should douse it, and if it’s a mirror, we smash it. Something like that.”

“But if you use spells, then there are presumably other ways… Like Fang Xiu’s mention of the Samadhi True Fire Talisman.”

Blondie hollered, “Nice, boss, that’s brilliant…”

Pleased with himself, Jia Xu went on. “We’re still not sure if evil spirits are bound by the taboos…”

Guan He frowned slightly and muttered, “Didn’t Fang Ge already go over all this this morning? Why’s he rehashing it with diagrams?”

Fang Xiu didn’t mind. “He’s including visuals. It makes it look more official.”

Cheng Songyun leaned over to look but murmured, “I still can’t follow the diagrams.”

Fang Xiu: “…At least it looks the part.”

Bai Shuangying remained indifferent. Relying on his hidden skill, he didn’t whisper at all. “Pathetic clown.”

Fang Xiu tugged on Bai Shuangying’s sleeve. “Having someone else step up to the plate can be helpful, too.”

Near the end, Jia Xu politely thanked Fang Xiu for the “inspiration”. Now Fang Xiu understood that Jia Xu wasn’t just playing leader for fun. He was used to a leadership role and couldn’t simply turn it off.

Bai Shuangying lowered his eyes. “I’ve seen plenty of men like him. In times of chaos, they don’t live long.”

Fang Xiu stifled a laugh. “I know, I know.”

With that, Bai Shuangying merely grunted. He glanced at the drinks on the table and selected a small bottle of soda. He calmly opened it, poured the soda into Fang Xiu’s cup, and kept the empty glass bottle for himself.

Fang Xiu: “…?”

He was about to ask why when Cheng Songyun quietly nudged him.

Making up her mind, she said softly, “Xiao Fang, I-I’d like to help you.”

“I won’t ask what you do. About what you did to Fourth Master, I haven’t told the others and won’t bring it up in the future, either.”

“I know you’re strong. As long as you’re willing to take me with you, I’ll let you use my ghost, and I’ll help you however you need.”

Fang Xiu was a bit surprised.

Just that ghost shield was enough to make him want to keep her safe. She didn’t have to go this far. If she’d seen how he’d turned Shan Huanzi into shredded meat, she might have reconsidered.

So he answered seriously, “Are you sure? I’m not picky about my methods. If necessary, I might sacrifice you.”

Cheng Songyun shook her head, giving a faint smile. “Auntie thinks you’re a good kid. If it really can’t be helped… then it can’t be helped.”

Then, as if remembering something, she lowered her eyes. “And if it’s someone like Fourth Master, I could kill too. As long as it doesn’t involve harming the innocent, I’ll do anything.”

Fang Xiu was silent for a few seconds.

“Alright,” he said.

When you only have one day off, time runs at double speed. Jia Xu’s “Underworld team-building” session ended, and it was already afternoon.

The festive atmosphere soon fizzled out. No one could relax any further, not even Blondie. They all knew that after dinner and some sleep, a new round of rituals awaited.

No one knew how many of them would still be alive the next time they gathered back here.

Fang Xiu took it in stride. The rituals wouldn’t be postponed just because they felt ill at ease. He and his ghost returned to their room, pondering how to feed Bai Shuangying something.

Then he noticed Bai Shuangying taking out that little soda bottle from lunch.

It was a 200ml glass soda, short and squat, perfectly transparent. Bai Shuangying wiped it clean, placed it upright on the ritual table, and inserted the paper flower from the temple fair.

Once he’d stuck it in, he even adjusted it multiple times, searching for the most perfect angle. His white eyes followed the flower intently, shifting as he made minute corrections.

Watching that white-clad figure, Fang Xiu felt a slight ache in his chest.

“You’re not going to wear it for the next ritual?” he couldn’t help asking.

“No. I won’t,” Bai Shuangying said at last, pleased with the angle he’d found.

“It’s too fragile,” he continued. “I don’t want to break it right now.”

……

Early the next morning, the second ritual arrived on schedule.

Compared to the first time’s confusion and anxiety, this time the air was heavy. They followed the paper figure up the stairs to the second floor, and no one spoke along the way.

The second-floor corridor no longer resembled a rustic country road. Instead, it was now an old apartment hallway. Even the walls were plastered with “locksmith ads”. The door at the end had a rusty, peeling surface, the kind found in older stairwells. Behind it lay darkness.

Fang Xiu casually grabbed hold of Bai Shuangying’s sleeve, and they walked side by side.

“This is something else… The second floor even has a new setting,” Fang Xiu whispered to his ghost. “I’m guessing this time we’re in some apartment building—ow!”

The moment everyone stepped through the doorway, some sort of change erupted.

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The author has something to say:

They’ve been completely exposed—totally seen through! (In that tone of voice.) 

Too bad those two are still clueless, tsk tsk tsk. 

The second ritual is about to begin—this time, let’s see who can guess the story (*/ω＼*). 

The style of the entire book is basically the same as the first story; there won’t be anything super dark or grim, so just relax and enjoy~n’t be anything super dark or grim, so just relax and enjoy~

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