Author: 颜凉雨 / Yan Liang Yu

Translator: Kinky || https://kinkytranslations.com/

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Chapter 12

Wang Xi helped Ran Lin secure auditions for two roles—one as the second male lead and the other as the third male lead. As the variety show had not yet aired and the airport incident’s hype had almost completely faded, Ran Lin’s life returned to its usual calm during the filming break. He spent his days exercising and preparing for the scenes he had to audition for.

Both auditions were scheduled for the same day, one in the morning and the other in the afternoon. Wang Xi personally accompanied Ran Lin to meet the directors. Although he was nervous, once the actual audition started, he forgot everything else.

On the way back, he asked Wang Xi how he performed. Wang Xi, not usually generous with praise, commented that he acted well but hesitated before adding that he probably wouldn’t get either role.

They were in the company’s business car. Along with the driver, there were only Wang Xi, Ran Lin, and Liu Wanwan. To facilitate communication, Wang Xi and Ran Lin sat in the back, while Liu Wanwan sat in the passenger seat.

Stuck in rush-hour traffic, the driver, bored, asked Wang Xi for permission before opening a window and lighting a cigarette.

In the faint tobacco scent, Wang Xi, who had been silent the whole trip, suddenly looked at Ran Lin with interest and said, “I’ve noticed something interesting about you. You tend to overthink everything you do, except when acting. You immerse yourself completely, oblivious to everything else.”

Ran Lin pondered over this and seemed to grasp something. “Did I not do well in the auditions? Did the directors look displeased?”

“No, no.” Wang Xi clarified. “They had no issues with your acting. But they didn’t really care how you performed. Both directors wanted to interrupt you midway but probably didn’t because of the person who introduced you. And since you didn’t make eye contact with them, they didn’t find a chance to let you finish your performance.”

Ran Lin was surprised. “Are you saying they had decided not to cast me even before my audition?”

Wang Xi shrugged and pulled a face. “Yeah, the main cast was probably already decided, and the auditions were just a formality.”

Ran Lin nodded, asking no further questions.

Despite Wang Xi’s casual tone, as if she were just casually informing him that he didn’t get the roles, the fact that she noticed the situation during the auditions but waited until now to mention it didn’t align with her usual straightforward demeanor. Ran Lin understood that she was considering his feelings, carefully contemplating the best time and way to break the news to him.

Ran Lin wanted to tell Wang Xi that he wasn’t that fragile. She must have put in a lot of effort to secure these opportunities for him. A project always involves negotiations from various parties, especially for significant roles like these, which involve many relationships. The actual investors might have their preferred actors, or the roles might have already been secured through stronger connections.

“We’ll face situations like this again in the future. Just get used to it.” Wang Xi sighed, rubbing her temples. She wasn’t too pleased herself; understanding the industry didn’t mean she wasn’t affected. Moreover, she had been busy with Han Ze’s issues lately, which was exhausting. “We have the second recording the day after tomorrow. You’re okay with that, right?”

“No problem,” Ran Lin quickly assured her. “I’ll just be myself, like you said. I’m getting the hang of it.”

Wang Xi nodded in satisfaction, then added, “Remember to interact more with Lu Yiyao. Don’t just stick with Xia Xinran all the time. He has a great sense of variety, and you won’t stand out next to him.”

Ran Lin was stunned, remaining silent for a long time. Wang Xi, unaware of his reaction, leaned back to rest after her reminder.

Only Liu Wanwan, who had been eavesdropping, was left with complex emotions, staring straight ahead, lost in thought.

The traffic finally started moving. The driver extinguished his cigarette and gently pressed the accelerator, inching forward with the flow of cars.

Ran Lin gazed out the window into the smoggy haze.

He was so deep in thought that he imagined the smog dispersing and the traffic disappearing, replaced by a clear blue sky and a river, with Xia Xinran’s frantic yelling and Lu Yiyao inviting him to try the noodles he had made.

He smiled unconsciously. Turning back from his reverie as if making a decision, he addressed his agent, “Xi Jie.”

“Hmm?” Wang Xi responded without opening her eyes.

Ran Lin’s voice was soft but clear. “Didn’t you say I should just be myself?”

Wang Xi frowned slightly, then opened her eyes reluctantly, looking at him curiously. “What are you talking about?”

Ran Lin knew she had been half asleep, so he repeated, “You said I should be myself, right? Being myself means choosing who I want to hang out with, doesn’t it?”

Wang Xi was now fully awake and sat up straight, her sharp gaze scanning Ran Lin’s face. “Are you trying to tell me that you prefer Xia Xinran over Lu Yiyao?”

Ran Lin shook his head gently. “I don’t dislike anyone, they’re all good. Xia Xinran is genuine and straightforward. Lu Yiyao is dedicated. No matter how bizarre the segments and tasks are, he insists on completing them. Zhang Beichen is friendly, and Gu Jie is reliable. Each person has their qualities. So, if you ask me to be myself, I won’t have a preference. I’ll follow the show’s setup, be in any team they put me in, won’t deliberately avoid anyone, nor do I want to cling to anyone.”

After speaking, Ran Lin waited for Wang Xi’s response.

She looked at him with a half-smile, taking her time before responding coldly, “Why do I feel like you’re not just protesting about the variety show but also complaining about me tying you to Lu Yiyao for publicity?”

Ran Lin pondered for a moment, then raised his eyes to meet Wang Xi’s, without evasion, sincere, and forthright. “Xi Jie, can I talk to you about what’s in my heart?”

“Of course,” Wang Xi responded without hesitation. “You are my artist now, and your future depends on our joint efforts. If you can’t be honest with me, then what am I busy with?”

Ran Lin didn’t expect such openness from Wang Xi, thinking he would be mocked before getting to the point. His prepared defenses relaxed, and he spoke more freely. “Then I won’t hold back. About the hype, I do have some regrets…”

Seeing Wang Xi’s disapproving frown, Ran Lin quickly added, “But that’s in the past, and I did benefit from it, so I won’t complain. I want to talk about the future.”

Wang Xi crossed her arms, listening intently.

“Xi Jie, let me ask you one thing: if I stop tying myself to anyone, if I don’t leech off anyone’s popularity and rely solely on my efforts, can I still make it?”

A long, quiet pause followed.

Finally, Wang Xi, who had been watching him, said softly, “What do you mean by ‘make it’?”

Ran Lin had always known the answer. “To get work, to act in films. I don’t mind not being famous, as long as every role I play is recognized and appreciated.”

Wang Xi scoffed. “Why would anyone give you roles if you’re not famous?”

Ran Lin smiled lightly, exuding a playful confidence. “There are roles for the famous, and there are roles for the not-so-famous. Not all production teams are flush with cash. Some directors pursue art… uh, and cost-effectiveness.”

“Hmm,” Wang Xi nodded as if she were seriously considering it, then said, “Those few anti-Japanese war drama crews in Hengdian right now would welcome an actor like you.”

Ran Lin was bemused by Wang Xi’s sharp tongue. He still held back some thoughts that he felt were too naive to voice. Not that he was afraid to say them, but even he found them childish.

“Alright, stop beating around the bush. You just don’t want to be hyped up, and you want your work to speak for itself, right?” Wang Xi had seen many artists and understood his intentions from his first sentence.

Ran Lin looked at her in surprise, realizing for the first time how inexperienced he really was.

Wang Xi didn’t mince words with him. “With your current resources and conditions, relying on your work to build a reputation and popularity is like starting from zero. You may not see any results until your contract ends. The company has no reason to bypass shortcuts and invest in something that seems unlikely to pay off with you.”

Ran Lin remained silent. What she said was harsh but true, and he couldn’t refute it.

Wang Xi knew he couldn’t argue but also saw his determination. “Still not giving up?”

Ran Lin nodded almost imperceptibly, his movement light and gentle yet persistent: “Xi Jie, I’ve been with the company for over two years. Before the airport fiasco, I hadn’t had any engagements for a long time, and I was prepared to switch careers. So, when the airport incident happened, I was very confused. On one hand, I knew such opportunities were rare, but on the other, something felt off. I even hoped I would never run into Lu Yi’ao again because what was done was quite unscrupulous and hard to justify.”

“Everyone in the circle…”

“I know many people in the circle do this, but I also know many are working diligently, acting, and promoting themselves. There’s nothing wrong with hyping up one’s acting skills, even exaggerating a bit, as long as I’m not feeling guilty. I’d be happy to talk it up to the skies. But creating hype by leveraging others’ popularity and heat—that’s not right… No matter how many people do it, it’s still not right.”

Wang Xi clicked her tongue, still surprised by Ran Lin’s resolve. “Did Lu Yiyao put a spell on you? Have you become his die-hard fan?”

Ran Lin couldn’t help but laugh at her wild imagination. “I’ve spoken less than ten sentences with him over two days.”

Wang Xi was puzzled. “Then why this sudden conscience?”

“It wasn’t sudden.” Ran Lin laid bare his thought process. “I felt guilty from the start, but I didn’t know him then. During the filming, he hardly looked at me, and I almost wanted to apologize…”

“You apologized?” Wang Xi was astonished.

“No, he never gave me a chance, avoiding me as much as possible.” Recalling Lu Yiyao’s disdainful gaze, Ran Lin felt he deserved it. “This is just the first episode, and there are seven more to go. If I continue as you suggested, clinging to him, then that friendship will be completely lost.”

“Young man, you think too much.” Wang Xi sighed helplessly. “No one wants to be friends with a small fry like you.”

Ran Lin said, “Fine, not friends, but we’ll be acquaintances after eight episodes. I really can’t keep leeching off him. If you insist I continue interacting with him, I assure you my performance in front of the camera will be embarrassingly awkward.”

Wang Xi stared at him for a full minute before rolling her eyes and sighing wearily. “I finally know why you can’t become famous…”

Ran Lin nodded in agreement. “I know I’m particularly naïve.”

Wang Xi, having her words stolen from her mouth, paused for two seconds before bursting into laughter. “You’re like this because you haven’t faced setbacks—a naive and romantic idealist—and there’s no need for self-loathing.”

Ran Lin wasn’t sure if Wang Xi agreed or not.

“So, here’s the deal.” Wang Xi, who suppressed her smile and regained her composure, offered a compromise. “Your variety show airs on February 14^th, running for eight episodes, which means it will end in mid-April. I promise from now until mid-March, your promotions won’t be tied to anyone. We’ll see the results. But if your performance doesn’t hold up and the show doesn’t make an impact—if we can’t find a highlight for promotion, I’m sorry, but you’ll have to follow the company’s plans afterward.”

“You really agreed?!” Ran Lin couldn’t believe his luck.

“My artist wants an apple, and even if I have to steal the peaches from heaven for it, it won’t end well. Why bother?” Wang Xi hesitated before reaching out to pat Ran Lin’s head like a strict sister. “But you only have four episodes. Treasure and make the most of them.”

That night, a Weibo blogger named “Curly Curly Eyelashes”, who had once caused a small stir but then faded into obscurity, posted after many days of silence:

[Attention, friends on my homepage: As of today, this blog is stopping updates. From now on, I won’t be a fan of any idols or CPs, officially returning to the real world. Yes, I’m dedicating myself to work!!! ✊]

……

The recording cycle of “National First Love Drifting Story” was the same as its broadcasting cycle, lasting eight weeks, with one episode recorded each week. The day after Ran Lin’s unsuccessful audition, he hurried non-stop to the location for the second episode’s recording in Sichuan.

The two-day recording began with the first day in Jiuzhaigou and the second in the urban area of Chengdu. Perhaps learning from the chaos of the first episode, the production of the second episode was noticeably more compact and organized. The female host was gone, and all segments were communicated to the guests in advance by the crew, who then completed the tasks themselves.

The beautifully snow-covered Jiuzhaigou, the adorable Giant Panda Breeding Base, Du Fu Thatched Cottage, Kuanzhai Alley… Although still centered around game segments, there was less of a competitive feel and more of a touristic vibe, allowing Ran Lin and the others to enjoy a real vacation.

The selected “Spicy First Love” of the episode was Xia Xinran.

The reason was simple: Xia Xinran relished eating super spicy hot pot from start to finish. While the other four, including Ran Lin, were in tears, he remained spirited and didn’t even ruin his makeup. After finishing, he even reminisced about the previous episode, complaining that he wasn’t given the option of insanely spicy rice noodles as a punishment, which led him to drink the dreadful super lemon bitter gourd juice, still feeling its sour and bitter taste on the flight home that evening.

Ran Lin thought this episode would be quite interesting to watch. Compared to the previous one, their interactions had become more natural and smoother, occasionally tossing and catching jokes effectively.

However, his interactions with Lu Yiyao were still limited. He didn’t go out of his way to talk to him, and Lu Yiyao certainly didn’t take the initiative to approach him. The only time they were grouped together, they weren’t paired, resulting in nothing more than polite exchanges throughout the recording.

From Lu Yiyao’s perspective, everything might seem the same. But from Ran Lin’s, since he had let go of his mental burden, even with minimal communication, he felt more relaxed and even found Lu Yiyao more attractive.

But honestly, Ran Lin still felt that Lu Yiyao hadn’t fully let go. Without comparing him to Xia Xinran, even against the normal performances of Gu Jie and Zhang Beichen, Lu Yiyao seemed a bit too reserved.

Initially, Ran Lin thought it was due to fame, as many in the circle behave that way, feeling their status prevents them from mingling freely.

But after observing for two episodes, it didn’t seem to be the case. Firstly, Lu Yiyao’s status wasn’t much higher than Gu Jie and Xia Xinran, at best slightly more popular. Secondly, in their limited interactions, Lu Yiyao didn’t seem to be intentionally elevating himself. He was meticulous in his tasks and cooperative with partners, diligently participating throughout the recording.

What then caused this sense of distance?

Even Zhang Beichen commented on the way back to the hotel after the second episode’s recording, suggesting that Lu Yiyao was perhaps taking himself too seriously.

Ran Lin just smiled and didn’t continue the topic with Zhang Beichen. After returning to Beijing, he thought over the past four days of interactions and felt it wasn’t as Zhang Beichen described. Lu Yiyao’s unapproachability seemed more a trait of his personality rather than his approach to situations.

If Lu Yiyao were in Ran Lin’s less prominent position, Ran Lin believed he would still behave the same way.

So, Ran Lin thought, Lu Yiyao was naturally reserved, or, to put it another way, not warm. Even if occasionally playful, he always maintained a comfortable distance.

Suddenly, it was February 10^th, which was time for the third episode’s recording in Sanya, Hainan.

With the program set to premiere in four days, promotional clips had been online for a week, entering the countdown to broadcast. To boost interest, snippets from the first episode were being released.

These snippets might or might not make it into the final cut, but they were certainly eye-catching or cute enough to stand alone for a minute or two. Ran Lin, having some spare time—as Wang Xi had become more cautious in seeking audition opportunities for him following the previous mishap—spent his days browsing the program’s Weibo. Watching each snippet and recalling the experiences made for an interesting pastime.

However, the behind-the-scenes footage mainly featured the more popular guests. So, although Ran Lin was always included, most of it actually revolved around Lu Yiyao and Xia Xinran, followed by Zhang Beichen and Gu Jie. Ran Lin rarely appeared, and when he did, it was mostly as a background figure for these companions.

The recording was scheduled for February 10^th, with a flight to Sanya on the evening of the 9^th. On the way to the Capital Airport, Ran Lin finally saw a clip about himself on the program’s Weibo.

[#National First Love Drifting Story Premieres on 2.14# Eighth Exclusive Behind-the-Scenes Clip: A single-leaf flatboat on the Li River. Who is the ultimate Landscape Male God? Friendship first, competition second, @Zhang Beichen even offers the first place to @Ran Lin? [XX Satellite TV – National First Love Drifting Story’s short video]]

The video was short, just a few seconds, capturing the moment after a rapid-fire Q&A when he landed second on the bamboo raft and conversed with Zhang Beichen.

“How long have you been here?” That was his greeting to Zhang Beichen upon landing.

“Not long.” Zhang Beichen’s smile in the video was the same as it had been a couple of weeks ago.

“Don’t be modest. You were way ahead. I tried my best but didn’t even catch a glimpse of you.” That was his jest.

“Shall I let you have the first place then, and you can choose the room tonight?” Zhang Beichen said awkwardly, scratching his head.

The clip ended abruptly there.

Ran Lin frowned slightly, taking off his Bluetooth earphones and recalling that day’s events. If he remembered correctly, when Zhang Beichen offered to let him have the first place, he had refused, explaining it was just a joke. But the program’s clip didn’t include any of this.

Ran Lin understood the editing was done for sensationalism. From an audience’s perspective, the clip indeed had many talking points.

The clip had been posted an hour ago.

Unable to resist, Ran Lin scrolled up, and soon the most popular comments caught his eye:

Hui Jie Loves Watermelon: [Am I the only one who thinks Ran Lin’s face looks huge? Everywhere within the four seas is TM*, and he even gets first place handed to him. 🤷‍♀️]

*Clarity: This is a play on the idiom Within the four seas, everyone is a brother (四海之内皆兄弟). The poster replaced brother with TM (which is an abbreviation for 他妈 that is generally a vulgar way to express frustration of disdain). So while the original idiom refers to the meaning along the lines of “everyone is close like family”, this changes the meaning to more like “everyone is a motherfucker/everyone is the fucking same” in reference to basically saying how Ran Lin is a leech (hugging others’ thighs).

Deep Love for Beichen: [Da* Bei is always so warm! 😁]

*Big/Great (大) When used in front of a name, it expresses a kind of endearment or closeness.

Baby Lu’s Jane: [XX Satellite TV, just keep it up. A good show ruined by forcing in a favored person. One rotten apple spoils the whole barrel. 🤮]

Quit Smoking, Drinking, and Bilibili: [This is real sarcasm. You can see even Da Bei was embarrassed, directly offering the first place to him. 🐶]

“Ah—?”

While engrossed in reading, his phone was suddenly snatched away. Ran Lin instinctively exclaimed, only to shut up when he saw it was Wang Xi sitting in front.

Liu Wanwan watched the whole scene but didn’t dare to remind him.

“From now on, I’ll keep your phone until the recording is over,” Wang Xi stated, not asking but informing.

Ran Lin watched as his phone was placed into his manager’s bag. After a while, he managed to say, “I hadn’t finished reading yet…”

“I finished reading it for you.” Wang Xi zipped up her bag. “Eighty percent of it is mocking you. Good, you’ve successfully caught the audience’s attention.”

“What great news…” Ran Lin’s tone was sarcastic, but he felt heavy-hearted.

Although mentally prepared, seeing such relentless mockery was still quite a blow. Deep down, who doesn’t want to be liked? Only those with a thousand years of spiritual cultivation can absorb fighting spirit from such ridicule, and he probably couldn’t achieve that in this lifetime.

“The current public opinion is all superficial. Only when the full program airs will you see the real feedback from the audience. What you need to do now is to not think about anything else and focus on finishing the recording for the next two days.”

“…Yeah.”

Wang Xi knew that Ran Lin couldn’t completely stop thinking about it, but getting criticized is a rite of passage for every star. It doesn’t matter whether you want it or not, or whether you are famous or not.

Initially, she just wanted to take away his phone and not say much. After all, some things are ineffective when told by others and need to be realized personally. Moreover, comforting with kind words wasn’t her usual style.

But somehow, seeing the dejection in Ran Lin’s eyes, she ended up saying more than intended.

In her fifteen years as a manager, Wang Xi had worked with many artists, and Ran Lin was one of the most cooperative.

This cooperation wasn’t just about obedience, but about understanding her plans, grasping her intentions, and spontaneously offering more cooperation while carrying out her arrangements.

What was even more valuable was that Ran Lin knew how to communicate his thoughts and was willing to listen to others’ opinions. It wasn’t scary for artists to have their own ideas; what was scary was being wildly unrealistic.

Wang Xi thought that maybe this was Ran Lin’s charm.

He was comfortable to be around, making people unconsciously want to speak up for him and put in extra effort.

But whether this charm could be conveyed to the audience still depended on his luck.

Suddenly, the driver hit the brakes.

Wang Xi looked up in confusion, only to realize that, after all her thinking, they had already arrived at the airport.

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