Author: 反舌鸟 / Mockingbird
Translator: Kinky || https://kinkytranslations.com/
Chapter 18
Long Xingyu avoided Yu Ruoyun for several days. He would immediately change direction whenever he saw Yu Ruoyun, knocking over several people’s water cups, props, and phones, until he finally realized that Yu Ruoyun wasn’t even trying to find him.
His script had been revised a bit, generally adding more scenes for his character. It was very obvious that his supporting role had been given a tragic backstory, increasing Long Xingyu’s workload significantly. He didn’t mind. Memorizing lines, understanding the character, and practicing dancing filled his time completely, allowing him to forget about Yu Ruoyun.
“Why was the last scene cut?” Long Xingyu realized something was off as they neared the end of filming. The scene where Yu Ruoyun visits him before his character’s execution was gone. This was the part Long Xingyu had prepared for the longest, figuring out the dialogue and his character’s emotions before death. He even planned to discuss modifying the storyboard with the director. Was it really because they were afraid he’d outshine Yu Ruoyun?!
“Yu Ruoyun decided that. He’s the co-producer,” the director said. “He’s very kind to you.”
Kind? Adding a few tragic scenes and then cutting the final one—how was that kind?
“Yeah,” Long Xingyu finally said. “I should really thank him.”
The director expressed polite regret. “You’re wrapping up today. Next time we meet, it will probably be next year.”
“Next year?” Long Xingyu was confused.
“For the second season, if we keep the same director,” the director said. “Didn’t you know?”
Yu Ruoyun had mentioned investing more to shoot a second season, but Long Xingyu hadn’t considered it would involve him. Now it dawned on him. “So the open ending is to keep my character for the next season?”
“Exactly,” the director said. “I think you have a lot of talent. I hope you get more opportunities to develop.”
“Talent?” Long Xingyu smiled. He could tell the director genuinely believed it. “I don’t have any talent—just a lot of experience with failure.”
“Didn’t you say this is your first time acting?” the director asked.
“I’ve failed in other areas,” Long Xingyu thought, but realized he needed to maintain his facade as a newcomer. He continued his lie.
The director offered some comforting words about being young and having a bright future, with some setbacks being minor. Long Xingyu listened absentmindedly, remembering only the final sentence.
“You’re already doing better than many, and you have Yu Ruoyun helping you,” the director said.
He went to find Yu Ruoyun, who was always on set, even when others were filming. Xiao Qi held his phone, only giving it to him when necessary.
Long Xingyu grabbed a chair and shamelessly sat next to Yu Ruoyun, chatting as if nothing had happened, ignoring the looks from others.
“I’m wrapping up soon,” Long Xingyu said. “People think we’re having an affair. You’ll soon be betraying Jiang Yu.”
“Xiao Qi bought cold drinks for everyone earlier,” Yu Ruoyun said. “You were talking to the director, so she saved you one.”
Long Xingyu took it out. It was a few bottles of frozen drinks. With the hot weather and the remote filming location, Yu Ruoyun having his assistant buy some drinks earned him a lot of goodwill.
“I want that.” Long Xingyu pointed to the ice dessert with fruit syrup in Yu Ruoyun’s hand. “Do you have more?”
“That was the only one,” Yu Ruoyun said.
“Never mind then.” Long Xingyu knew his request was a bit much. He just suddenly wanted to try ice again, not having had it for a long time.
In the past, filming in remote areas without timely medical attention had ruined his stomach. Since then, he couldn’t eat anything too cold or spicy, even bringing his own water, making everyone think Jiang Yu was ridiculously picky.
“She ordered a large one.” Yu Ruoyun found another spoon from the bag. “Have a little.”
Taking a dessert that Yu Ruoyun had already eaten in broad daylight felt inappropriate, so Long Xingyu did just that. “Am I being too much? This will only fuel the rumors.”
“Do you think they’re just rumors?” Yu Ruoyun said gently. “Didn’t you say you’d pursue me the first time we met?”
“Not anymore,” Long Xingyu lied. “I’m touched by your deep love for Jiang Yu. I can’t intrude on such a beautiful romance and am content to stay in the shadows.”
Yu Ruoyun watched as the ice dessert slowly disappeared, suddenly thinking it might taste really good. He said, “Because I never said it.”
“Said what?”
“Even though I’ve remembered many things, I don’t think I’ve ever told him I loved him,” Yu Ruoyun said. “Such a simple thing, but it never happened. He was sensitive and always overthinking. I thought actions were more important than words, and we would be together for many years. One day, he’d understand that beyond our separate careers, we’d be together. But I forgot that words are also actions.”
So, during this time, he kept telling those around him—his father, his mother, Wu Yi, and Xiao Qi. “Did Jiang Yu ever mention me?”
Xiao Qi hesitated. “A few times.”
“What did he say?” Yu Ruoyun asked.
“Nothing important,” Xiao Qi evaded. “You’re so famous. He just mentioned your name.”
Yu Ruoyun understood then—it probably wasn’t anything good.
Again and again, he told others and himself that the relationship existed. It wasn’t a hallucination brought on by his brain injury. If there was no pain in dreams, then hallucinations couldn’t be so painful.
Long Xingyu finished the ice dessert without any stomach ache and felt satisfied, with no regrets.
“He would know,” Long Xingyu told Yu Ruoyun. “But look, he’s dead. Maybe in his next life, he’ll be a better person, less sensitive and petty, less like a ticking time bomb. You should move on with your life.”
“Of course I will,” Yu Ruoyun said, making Long Xingyu finally feel at ease.
“He’s dead, but I can’t die, right?” Yu Ruoyun’s gaze fell on Long Xingyu. “I have to live well, continue acting, find someone else worth loving, go swimming at the beach in summer, see snow on the mountaintop in winter, make love in bed—there are so many things to do. I have a long time ahead.”
“Then he will know that I am living well and have moved on, loving someone else. He won’t find peace even in reincarnation, so he’ll come back as a ghost to haunt me.”
“I never needed him to be a good person.”
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